


A Thousand Slowly Dying Sunsets

by ircnman (halfthyme)



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Actual Character Development Kinda, Character Study, Female Pronouns for Pidge | Katie Holt, Gen, Homesick Lance (Voltron), Keith/Lance (Voltron) Angst, M/M, honestly can be read as romantic or platonic idc, let them rest.......
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-03
Updated: 2017-02-03
Packaged: 2018-09-20 04:52:56
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,589
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9476552
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/halfthyme/pseuds/ircnman
Summary: Lance’s eyes are closed, the tilt of his neck leaving it bare and sharply elegant. His hair flops into his face, and his eyelashes are surprisingly long. Freckles are splashed across his cheeks and nose, telling a story of sunlight. When his eyes flicker open, the brilliant blue catches Keith off guard, the stars of the planetarium reflected in the blue like the moon in the ocean.Alternatively:Lance gets homesick, Keith is working on the whole "emotions" thing, and Hunk just wants everyone to be okay.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [A_A_Inc](https://archiveofourown.org/users/A_A_Inc/gifts).



> i know i'm gonna downplay this but i'm super excited (and nervous) to be posting my first fic on any site ever!!!! let me know if you liked it!!!
> 
> inspired by Birdy's "People Help the People".
> 
> Edited 5/23/18: fixed a couple things that'd been bothering me for a while (changed pidge's pronouns to she/her, fixed weird actions, etc)

They find solace and strife in the quiet moments. 

When the team isn't busy protecting the entire universe, which feels impossible, they try to relax. It's hard, of course, because once you’ve trained your body to respond to any possible threats anything can set off your unconscious reflexes.

Shiro worries about everything, but sometimes specifically who he’s become. After what he’d suffered during that long year, he knows he can’t ever go back to normal, whatever that had been.  Sleep itself brings its own terrors, so he tends not to; he doesn't want to hurt anyone . . 

He spends his free time bonding with the paladins - as much as possible - or studying Altean battle strategies. He tries so hard to be a solid rock for the rest of the team, but rock crumbles too.

Pidge can’t sleep well, most of the time. Her brain is racing all the time, and it hardly ever stops. Sometimes, she worries that the bags under her eyes will be become permanent. But her work helps, all the time, whether in battle or in daily life. The Altean technology is far ahead of Earth’s, but not perfect, so she likes to tweak appliances.

Whenever she’s having a bad night, she heads to the hangar to work through upgrades to the lions and bayards. Green doesn’t seem to mind being experimented on, but makes sure to let Pidge know when she needs to stop. 

Sometimes, Pidge just wants to see Matt again, with his stupid goofy grin, or their father, who always knew what to say in awkward moments. But she knows that leaving Voltron isn’t exactly an option, so she pushes on, saving planets but not possibilities.

Hunk just wants everyone to be okay. He knows that they’re just human, and nobody's perfect, but he worries that no one else can see that. 

He’s known Lance for so long that he’s aware of any shift in mood as it happens, but he’s also known Lance for long enough to know his insecurities. Hunk guesses that the others have the same problems. 

He tries to spend time with Pidge in the hangar when she’s not busy, so he knows about her insomnia. He notices the expressions Shiro makes when he’s overly worried and conscious of his every movement. He sees Keith slip away from the group, but he understands that Keith doesn’t want company. Hunk doesn’t want to confront anyone about these things, because he understands that they’re deeply personal, so he files them away and makes sure everyone is okay.

Keith and Lance have their own problems.

Time passes strangely in space. An hour, maybe more, finds Keith fidgeting in front of the door to the training deck. 

He knows, objectively, that training right after fighting off several dozen Galra warships isn’t a good idea. But his body is telling him to move, and this is the only way he knows how. Training and fighting and training some more is all he can do. He can’t sit still and learn Altean from Coran or Allura, he doesn’t have the technical skill to work with Pidge, he doesn’t want to sit around a sofa and talk about feelings with Shiro and Hunk, and Lance… well, Lance is a whole different issue. 

Keith’s reaching out when he can, but living in a desert for a year definitely didn’t help his already lacking social skills. Something about Lance just puts him on edge. Lance knows exactly how to make him uncomfortable, exactly how to press his buttons and get under his skin. But then Lance will draw him in, bickering with him about anything and everything, loud and obnoxious and demanding. He’s like an open book, but not quite. It’s as if Lance chooses which pages Keith gets to read and which stay glued together.

Keith gives up on training and moves away, towards nothing at all, thoughts of Lance swirling through his mind. At times like this, when he’s hyperfocused on one thing, he wanders the castle. Its ambiance offers a soft forgiveness, and the maze of hallways provides distractions. He’s never wanted to make a map of it. As Shiro would say, getting lost is part of the journey.

Today, he decides to wander.

Keith knows that the Castle isn’t really sentient, exactly, but something today seems to be guiding him. A feeling in his gut, like the energy that drew him to the Blue Lion, tells him where to go. Right, left, right, right again. 

He finds himself in front of another door, one that looks like the training deck’s. Maybe all the doors look the same to him. He doesn’t know, doesn’t care.

He taps the button to open the door, unsure of what may be behind it. It’s not what he’s expecting.

The door opens with a quiet whirr. Keith steps inside a room full of stars. They’re everywhere, projected on ceilings and walls and even the floor, as if in open space. He guesses it’s a planetarium of some kind, though why they would need one in the middle of space confuses him.

There’s a figure silhouetted against the stars, face tilted up in a way that lets the light reflect off of it. It’s beautiful and ethereal. Then he notices the glint of tears on cheeks.

Keith’s not good with people. He tends to bottle up his emotions, so when he sees other people showing their emotions he doesn’t know how to react. His reasoning is that if he keeps to himself, it won’t be a problem. But now, he’s surrounded by people he can almost call friends, people who don’t always hide their emotions. He doesn’t have experience with consolation. He can't deal with tears, but he’s going to have to try at some point, right?

He shuffles towards the silhouette, still trying to figure out who it is. 

“Go away, Shiro,” he hears, the weary and cracking voice so familiar, and then Keith realizes exactly what, or really who, he’s dealing with.

Lance. What a surprise. The universe is a cruel master, and apparently it enjoys embarrassing him at the worst possible times. First the bonding moment, and then this whole mess. Keith feels a stone settle in his stomach, but pushes it away. Lance doesn’t need him, but he can’t just leave now.

“Not Shiro, sorry,” he replies, trying to sound nonchalant, as if finding his rival and teammate crying in space is normal. Then everything becomes too much, sounds too loud and colors too bright, and he sinks to his knees next to his rival, pain in the ass, and partner.

They’re in the same position now, kneeling as if in prayer, their eyes looking up at the stars. Keith looks over at Lance to ground himself and remind him that it’s going to be fine, and just stares. 

Lance’s eyes are closed, the tilt of his neck leaving it bare and sharply elegant. His hair flops into his face, and his eyelashes are surprisingly long. Freckles are splashed across his cheeks and nose, telling a story of sunlight. When his eyes flicker open, the brilliant blue catches Keith off guard, the stars of the planetarium reflected in the blue like the moon in the ocean. The tears on his cheeks have nearly dried, and no fresh ones are falling, which Keith counts as a small victory.

They don’t talk. Keith understands that if they do, this peace, the spell they’re under, will be broken. He doesn’t want to break that trust, that tentative thing they’ve created, for communication. Slowly, he lifts a hand towards Lance, brushing hair out of his face, wiping the last tears from his cheeks. He lingers longer than he should, silently appreciating the feel of soft skin on his calloused fingers. 

Lance pushes his face into Keith’s fingers like a cat, and though every inch of Keith’s body is telling him to move away, he stays there. He knows that Shiro would want them to talk this over, but Shiro’s not here, and his gut tells him to reach out.

Keith catches Lance’s hands with his own free one. Lance moves closer and shudders against him, shivering in the cool canned air.

Keith’s hands card through Lance’s hair in a smooth pattern. The repetition is calming, allowing his mind to stop racing for once. Lance leans in and touches his forehead to Keith’s, their noses bumping. Lance gazes up at him, his eyes red-rimmed and piercing. Keith darts a look down at his plush lips, then nervously looks back up. Lance notices, biting his lip in an subconscious gesture.

Keith pulls away a little, blushing, and stutters a laugh. “Should we... talk about this?” He gestures between them vaguely, hoping Lance understands what he means.

Lance replies, voice surprisingly steady, “Should we?” He smirks, but Keith notices the lack of energy in it.

“We don’t have to.” The end of the sentence is left unspoken. Keith hopes he’ll understand what he’s trying to say.

“I, uh. I think I might want to talk. About it, I mean. Maybe, uh, maybe later?” Lance looks hopeful, like he hadn’t just been crying and lost. As if, Keith thinks, he found something, some part of him that he didn’t know he needed until now. 

Lance sniffles once, then leans into Keith’s shoulder. He’s warm, Keith knows that, has known that from the start, but having Lance pressed against his body is a different feeling altogether. 

It’s nice, he thinks. Something he might get used to.

**Author's Note:**

> the end was weirdly hard to write, for some reason. but i did it and it's done and i hope you liked it!
> 
> [ hit me up at my tumblr ](http://bruhgane.tumblr.com)


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